Travelling back to the motherland is always an event. Every summer Turks flock back to see their family and eat their own body weight in carbs.
Although its great to keep in touch with your roots and never forget your heritage, here are 5 problems people are faced with when they fly back to the motherland..
The fun begins when you land and get to customs. You will always be greeted with a look that says ‘Why have you have deserted your country?”
For a man, you will always be grilled about your army papers and be given a look like a traitor. Nothing says welcome back to you’re country than a long uncomfortable stare.
2 – No such thing as a diet
Remember the past few months and all that hard work you have done to get yourself beach body ready? well kiss that goodbye. You will have to eat your body weight in food everyday otherwise your nene will take offence.
Get ready for family to tell you that you’ve lost weight and then proceed to feed you.
Equally if they feel you’ve put on weight, they will still feed you.
You can’t win! Get used to it!
3 – Arguments with staff because their customer service is bad
Face it you will be having arguments daily about customer service, people not queuing, bad drivers – you name it. The worse thing is, there is nothing you can do to stop it.
On a recent trip to the motherland I had a minimum of 1 argument everyday, then your relatives wonder why not many people visit the country anymore!
4 – Everyone thinks you’re rich
A standard for anyone visiting the motherland. Just because you have worked hard, saved up and bought new clothes, they think that’s what you do all year round. I wish I could afford new clothes every week.
Remember that credit crunch thing? yeah that hit us bad, but you won’t know anything about that being 35, married with kids and still living with your anne, nene and teyze all under one roof.
Don’t you hate it when you get that one family member that comes to visit and no matter what you are wearing they will spend an hour talking about how they really like what you have and can’t find it anywhere
Cue face from your nene that says ‘ver… lutfen!‘
5 – You are required to bring back so much food
One of the most stressful moments of a Turkish persons life is that moment at check in when you are putting your luggage on the scales. The look of the check in assistant as they stare at the scales revealing you are 0.1 over your allowance and now have to open your suitcase revealing all the food your nene has snuck in.
Hellim, Molehiya, gabak, zeytin, Pastirma, olive oil – its all in there. Enough food to open a Meyhane!
All you can do is wrap it in beach towels and pray you don’t get caught when you land back home. Home where you are classed as a tourist