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An Idiots Guide To Reading A Turkish Kahve Cup

Millions of Turks around the world look to their Kahve cups a source of seeing what the future holds.  After years of extensive research (mainly growing up around Turkish women drinking Kahve), I have put together a guide on how you can read Turk Kahve cups and look like you know what you are talking about.

All you need to do when reading the cup is mention these 5 things and you will be the talk of the Koy for having special fortune powers:


1- Uzun bir yol var (There is a long road ahead)
Of course there always is, have you ever done anything with Turkish people. There is no such thing as an easy way, everything is (especially flights to North Cyprus)


2 – Bir sikinti var (There could be trouble ahead)
When is there never trouble with us Turks? Drama is built into our DNA. Whether it’s working out who’s coming to a wedding, or who’s hosting the sunday Kebab there is always drama.. look at Turkish Dizi’s – Drama and then some.


3 – Aiyle’den biri gelecek (Somone in the family is coming)
With more flights than ever flying from Turkey and Cyprus, of course there’s always someone in the family coming. Also everyone is related so per plane you will know at least 2 people and be related to at least 5. See ‘How to tell if Turks are related’ post for evidence.


4 – Haber var (there is news)
This has to be the most vague piece of information you will always get from a kahve cup. The reader will usually say they can’t tell whether its good or bad, but expect news. Of course this could range from someone in the village dying to a new TFC opening. It’s coming… be ready for it.


5 – Bir yabancı görürüm
Of course you do oh wise fortune teller, you see a stranger. How many strangers does the average human being come into contact with per week? however this one piece of news has us quacking in our terliks because we have no idea what this stranger could be. Is it good? is it bad? who knows.


So there you have it, bookmark this page and try offering to read someones kahve cup using the 5 points above. Guarantee they will be impressed.